Word of the Day – Incredulous

(the following anecdote happened on Monday, prior to 11/12’s bday…and I have been too crazy busy, AND yet still lazy at the same time, to write!)

12 helpfully provided me with his List of Demands aka Gift Idea List. Pretty much all xbox paraphernalia. He also kindly provided links and coupons. He is a bargain hunter, takes after his father obviously — warming his frugal heart. Two of the items were best purchased at Walmart….we don’t have one close to here unforch. Had to trek to Fairfax (the Frug says anything outside the Beltway is West Virginia and I’m inclined to agree).

Found the xbox controller he wanted as well as the xbox 360 live 12 month something or other that he wanted.. Proceeded to the checkout. Cashier is old and surly and English is not his first language (not that there’s anything wrong with it — I’m just trying to set the scene for you)…First problem is that the gift card thingy couldn’t be activated, some kind of error with the card…I was like “can someone get another card for me?  “no, you have to go back to electronics yourself” *sighs* Next problem is that my AmEx’s magnetic strip won’t work…(overuse??? ssshhhh) I ask “can you just key in the number?” “no, we’re not allowed to do that” *sighs* of course you can’t. I pay for the controller with my MasterCard and move on. Go back to electronics and grab a new gift card. Have to go to Customer Service to pay — not sure why. While they ring it up, I notice that the surly dude has doubled charged me for the controller. *sighs*  The ensuing credit takes eons and for some unknown reason, they can’t credit the MasterCard and have to give me cash back…okay, whatever.  I leave and swear to never return.

Off to Best Buy for the rest of the xboxapalooza. Very helpful geeky teen gets me the stuff (prerdering games etc.) He also points out a controller that is $10 less than the Walmart one AND has 4 games on it! I buy it and the other stuff (miraculously, the AmEx works like a charm there — hmmm)…time to trudge back to Walmart to return the overpriced controller *cue ominous music*

Wait in line for Customer Service. Hand cashier the receipt and controller.

She scans it and says “I can’t accept your return”

Me:  “what?!?”

(Un) Customer Service Person:  “our system says you’ve already returned this item”

Me:  *groans* “no, I had been double charged for the item and you scanned it to process the credit. But I didn’t return this item

(Un) CSP:  “the system won’t allow you to return an item that has already been returned

Me:  “I did not return this item” (obviously, b/c it is in your hands right now!!!)  (thinking – I won’t let you break me! You.will.not.break.me)

(Un) CSP:  “I need to get the store manager”

Of course you do.  FML. Wait for the manager who also basically accuses me of some sort of fraudulent return scam.*growls and beats head repeatedly on counter*

Eventually (after losing several years of my life and adding more gray hair to my mop), the return is processed and I escape, vowing again to never, ever return.

This entire time, I’ve had my uber pleasant Kelly face on. Serene, calm, friendly. Inwardly, I am a frightening combination of the Notre Dame Fighting Irish Leprechaun Mr. T and Christian Bale in American Psycho

I am doing ninja assassin moves, listening to gangsta rap, and muttering bastardized movie lines…I pity the fool who won’t return this f*cking xbox controllerHasta La Vista, Walmart employee…you are f*cking with the wrong person!

Muahahaha

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This entry was posted on August 15, 2010, in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments

2 thoughts on “Word of the Day – Incredulous

  1. You are a rock star! I hate f’in Walmart and now I hate the Sprint store in Cape May New Jersey who won’t return the phone I bought last week because they said it was “used” wtf!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now, I have a shitty phone and a bad attitude.

  2. Pingback: 2010 in review « Kelly's Superfical

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