It’s hard to be so hot

Smokin’ hot. Yup, that’s me. I’m in my pre-vacation prep mode…it’s not pretty.

Armpit hair growing out?   CHECK!

Hoohah hair? (and lip/chin/brow…jeez, could I be any furrier?!)  CHECK!

Rockin’ some sweet hooves too…haven’t had a pedi in a few weeks (and even forwent – is that a word? – a pedi last weekend b/c I knew I wanted to get one for the beach and was feeling tres FRUGAL!) The gray roots are being taken care of tomorrow at least.  By Friday at this time, I shall be a new woman. For now? Avert your eyes please.

Editing in — yes, forwent IS a word…past tense of forgo!

However, I do have to wonder WHY I do all this.  After one week at the beach, the hair gets brassy (despite my valiant efforts to cover it w/something in addition to the ‘hair sunscreen glossy shine spray’), the hooves get all dried out and callousy AND my toe polish fades or chips…the skin? Well, forget it. I swear, even with SPF 70 AND sitting under an umbrella AND not being out for that long, the skin is all leathery and blotchy AND old  after the week is over! *growls in frustration*

To make matters worse, we are going to a wedding the day we leave the beach…shouldn’t matter to me since I’m not the bride, right?  C’mon…everyone knows that you want to look good at a wedding…remind the Frug of that young girl *cough* that he married! And, wedding pix last forever. I don’t want to go over to their house and have to see a picture of the Frug with some wearthered old Sea Hag, kwim?

*sighs*

I guess I shouldn’t “bragplain“, right?  Poor me!  Have to go the beach AGAIN!  For a whole WEEK!  Boo hoo!  I have to get a mani/pedi/wax/dye job!  Poor me!  *wails*

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This entry was posted on August 17, 2010, in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. 7 Comments

7 thoughts on “It’s hard to be so hot

  1. I am so tired of the cougar (old lady) “maintenance” that is required these days. It only lasts a damn week!!! You feel great for 3or 4 days and then you want to start ove – a week later, it’s like it never happened!. How do you have the energy to keep going????!!!!

    • It’s not getting any better or easier. I require more and more…more frequently. And I still look like this! aahh

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