I have been annoyed all day about this. I know there are guys who don’t wear wedding rings. But everyone knows they are douche bags, right? Prince William does not seem like a douche bag cheater or anything, right? He really seems like a decent kid. So, wear the damn ring, William. Actually, fine. You don’t have to wear it all the time but at least get married with one.
Aren’t there lines in the wedding ceremony about “take this ring as a sign of my love and fidelity”?? So, no ring is a sign of what then?? Exactly.
Click on the Spa Week link, enter your zip code and find out where the deals are! $50 spa treatments! I found massages, facials, laser hair removal, etc. for only $50! #stillnotFrugapproved *shrieks* I also saw a $50 Endermologie treatment…am curious about this…I’m thinking it’s probably a scam…but, for $50 it worth a try, right? If nothing else, it’s a deep tissue massage/steamroller treatment for the thighs and butt! #win.
haha! The infamous “Penis Gummies” incident! Apparently, Katie addressed this photo on Ellen the other day.
(In pics that stormed the web, Suri checked out a colorful box of “Penis Gummies,” featuring drawings of anatomically correct chewy candies.)
Continued Holmes sheepishly: “P-e-n-i-s gummies. I said, oh wow those aren’t Swedish fish. . . They are called p-e-n-i-s gummies and they look like it.”
Um, Katie? You can say penis. You’re a grown woman and a mother. It’s the anatomically correct term for it. Spelling it out like that makes it seem like you’re afraid of it…or maybe are just unfamiliar with it?? Hmm.
Armpits. *shudders* I hate armpits. And yet, armpits fascinate me. If you raise your arms in front of me, I am so looking at those pits. I just am. *hair flip* I am obsessed w/furr-free pits. I am, however, cursed with underarms that seem unable to be closely shaven. Always a 5 o’clock shadow there. The only thing that works is waxing but I HATE HATE HATE the feeling of stubbly pits during the grow-out-the-hair week(s). So dirty. So manly. Yuck.
Anyway, looks like I am not alone in armpit-worry…
Remember to include the Unilever corporation on your Christmas card list this year, ladies: without their groundbreaking research, you wouldn’t know enough to be publicly concerned about the hideousness of your armpit region.
I mean, you’ve probably been walking around for years with repulsive, off-putting underarms, constantly serving as a living mockery of your put-together appearance. Those days are over. The WSJ says that Unilever’s research found that “93% of women consider their armpits unattractive.” Haha! It’s so true, ladies. And don’t even get us started on the soles of your feet.
Thankfully, the Unilever corporation has designed a new product that you can purchase to address this heretofore unimportant problem. “Dove Ultimate Go Sleeveless, which hits U.S. stores this week, claims its formula of specialized moisturizers will give women better-looking underarms in five days.” Can you really afford not to purchase it? Every day without an application of Dove Ultimate Go Sleeveless is a day that you fall farther behind in the eternal underarm beauty race.
Buy it now, women. You have no choice.
*dust cloud* Off to buy Dove Ultimate Go Sleeveless! (also thinking of the adage – Sleeveless is a Privilege, not a Right)