Oh Christmas Fail, Oh Christmas Fail…

Good Morning, Superficialistas!

Spent yesterday decorating. We are now at the “tasteful” stage. Which Will. Not. Do. Perhaps it’s because a) I don’t have a daughter and b) the Frug wants to live in a sterile steel cube but I must have glitz and glitter and MORE MORE MORE decorations!! *twirls giddily* I swear the Frug was following behind me “un-decorating” and asking “Cow? Are you sure we need this Noel-wreath-tchotchke thing??” (Yes, dammit, I am very sure)

The beauty of “Opposites Attract”, right? *giggles*

So, I had a Fail –> SAVE the other day. The holidays, sneaky bastards, caught me by surprise AGAIN this year. Thursday was December 1st and holy crap, where were the chocolate Advent Calendars??? I saw them at Trader Joe’s a few weeks ago but decided not to buy them early. (with the ADD/early onset dementia thing, I tend to buy items early, hide them, and then either forget that I bought them OR forget where in the heck I hid them!)…

So, I remember that we need the Advent Calendars at around 4pm. Head to Target aka Mecca. (actually, I suppose calling it Mecca in reference to Christmas items isn’t terribly appropriate! lol)  I wandered through the Christmas section aimlessly til I found an employee to ask…

Excuse me, where are your Advent Calendars?”

–blank stare– Okay.

“Do you carry the “countdown to Christmas calendars” that have little chocolates in them?”

–blank stare–“We have calendars in the office supply section“…


Never mind.  Luckily, a nice woman was walking by and said “Safeway has them” and off I went.

Wandered through Safeway’sSeasonal” area. Nothing. They are usually at the end of an aisle or somewhere visible. *sighs* Nothing.  Find a worker to ask:

Excuse me, where are your Advent Calendars?”

–blank stare–

“Do you carry the “countdown to Christmas calendars” that have little chocolates in them?”  

“Oh, ma’am, the chocolate is in aisle 8”


Sooooo, I leave in a huff and call Trader Joe’s…”Oh, we ran out of them but are expecting to get 4 more in tomorrow”  Four?? What?  And tomorrow is NOT Dec. 1st. Starting the Advent Calendar on Dec. 2nd is sacrilege!

At this point, it’s 6pm and I’m at another Safeway…did I mention how much I hate Safeway??  Ask 2 more workers and get the now-expected blank stare. Honestly, were these people raised by wolves?! ADVENT CALENDARS!  Jeez!  So, I marched over to Customer Service and talked to the person there:

Excuse me, do you carry Advent Calendars?”


*whimper and deep breath in* “No, ADVENT CALENDAR” (seriously about to cry now)

“Oh! Yes, right this way!

Thank you, Sweet Baby Jesus. Christmas is SAVED!

Get them home, expecting a hero’s welcome. *snorts* As if.

OMG, MOM!  You KNOW I HATE those calendars!


This entry was posted on December 5, 2011, in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. 1 Comment

One thought on “Oh Christmas Fail, Oh Christmas Fail…

  1. Fear not – I used to think I hated those calendars too, since the chocolate was never up to my sweets snob standards, but I now look back on them fondly as a fun childhood memory.

    And I started my Advent calendar this year on December 3rd, so I say we get amnesty for doing them at all pre-Christmas Day.

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