Best Laid Plans

(this happened a few weeks ago but I’ve been too busy and lazy — yes, that IS possible — to write about it)

Learned some life lessons the other day.  The first one was “Do not schedule a “Kelly Day” in advance.” That just gives the universe time to plan some shizz to mess with said Kelly Day.  It wasn’t even going to be a wild Kelly Day. Just some “fun” errands, maybe some recreational shopping and that’s about it.  My time though. Not the Frug’s. Not Otis’s. MINE. Kelly Time. *sighs* Anyway, I’d just dropped 10 off at school, unloaded the dishwasher (which was obviously not aware of it being a Kelly Day *rolls eyes*) when I see that Sarcasmo’s school is calling. FML. I never answer the phone. Hate the phone. But, when I see that it’s the school, I know it’s the nurse.  *sighs*

Yes, it was the school nurse calling to tell me that Sarcsmo had a cut on his finger. A cut that was apparently bleeding profusely.  Of course, I come to find out that he was goofing around with one of his friends.  Playing with scissors. *sighs*  By the time I posted the incident on my Facebook, I’d “upgraded” the incident to a stabbing. Made a much better story that way. Right?! lol And btw, if I haven’t said this before, it bears saying: Boys are Stupid.

My Kelly Day flies out the window. Instead I have to go grab Sarcasmo from school and take him to the emergency room. Part of me hoped that he didn’t need stitches. The other part, the more dominant and selfish part, thought “That kid better need stitches!” And the verdict from the rather cute doc was “Yes, stitches“…The boy is rather stoic which is good b/c boy oh boy, there’s a lot of blood. The doc reopened the wound to administer the 2 shots of lidocaine. Drip. Drip. Drip. *gags*

So, I’m watching the blood drip while the doc sews. Sarcasmo is watching it too. (Btw, how??  How could he watch?! eep!) And then he says “I can’t feel the stitches. All I can feel is the warmth of the blood dripping down.” *gags* Even the doctor shuddered.  Sarcasmo was like “What? What’s wrong with saying that?” So much was wrong with that statement. Am I right? *shivers*

So, in the midst of all this fun, I get a phone call.  And it’s coming from 10’s school. FML again. It’s his aide, not the nurse TG. She tells me “He’s having a hard day and wants to talk to you”  (HE is having a hard day??) He was having “intersession” which is a 2 week “break” from regular classes. He was taking “Drama” (imagine that) and “Video Game Design“…the day’s trauma and drama was that His Majesty didn’t get the right role in the Drama Class play. He got the role of “Admiral” when he should have been “KING” *rolls eyes*  The Admiral role isn’t the STAR. And doesn’t have the MOST LINES.  And how could this possibly be since he’s obviously a STAR and has a beautiful speaking voice and on and on and on.

So, he’s complaining and complaining and I’m sitting there half-listening and finally I had to interject, “You know what?? I can’t talk to you right now. I’m sitting here in the HOSPITAL with your brother who is BLEEDING and getting STITCHES!” He yells “FINE!” and hangs up the phone violently. Drama Queen. lol.

Sarcasmo is sitting there looking nonplussed. I think the life lesson here for him was this…”Even if you’re bleeding in the hospital, your brother will still find a way to make it all about him.”

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