Natalie Portman Didn’t Have Cake At Her Wedding

Natalie Portman is dead to me. Dead. No cake?? At a wedding?!?!?!?!?!  There are rules. Especially for weddings. You can skip the stupid garter-tossing fuckery. Don’t want to toss the bouquet? No problemo. You can forgo all the expensive tchotchkes like imprinted napkins and the like.

But…

YOU MUST HAVE CAKE.

Sigh.

I guess maybe no cake is better than some disgusting vegan-tofu-prechewed shit like Alicia Silverstone probably had at her wedding.

Nah, cover that with some icing and it’s all good.

(go read what mah boo Michael K had to say about this switch)

Natalie Portman Didn\’t Have Cake At Her Wedding.

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