Archive | April 2011

Oh Where, Oh Where, Oh Where Has My Adorable Firstborn Gone?

Oh Where, Oh Where Can He Be??

*grumbles*

The Frug and I had dinner out last night with 9 and 12’s replacement, Sarcasmo, the Sullen and Obnoxious.  I hate that guy.

He’s not even a teenager yet!  How many years of eye rolls and snotty comebacks can we expect??

EVERYTHING was cause for a snippy retort. Luckily for me (sort of), the brunt of this falls to the Frug. Sarcasmo had comments for everything he did…

The Frug (ordering): “I’d like the antipasto platter. Does that have an onions in it?”

Sarcasmo: “OMG DAD! Did you even read the menu? It doesn’t have onions!  Why would it ?*shakes head* and *rolls eyes*

The Frug: “Excuse me, can I have a Miller Lite bottle?” 

Waiter: “We have it on draft, not in a bottle”

Sarcasmo: “I cannot believe Dad just tried to order a Miller Lite in a bottle. Unbelievable” *rolls eyes*

And there were general snorts of derision for all of us…including the restaurant selection.

Sarcasmo: “Oh great! Faccia Luna?? AGAIN?! WHY????!!!! Can’t we have any variety??

Sarcasmo: “Perfect, 9 chose the restaurant. Great.” #sarcasmfont

Me: “Well, we’re going out to celebrate his straight As on his report card” *smirking*

Sarcasmo: *belligerent glare*

Later…

Waiter: “Would you like another Coke?”

Sarcasmo: “No, I’m okay

The Frug and I: “It’s No, thank you, not just NO

Sarcasmo: “What??? I didn’t want another one”

Us: “You say NO THANK YOU to be POLITE”

Sarcasmo: “That’s stupid. You guys are crazy.” *rolls eyes*

In “conversation” (in quotes b/c there was no actual conversation…just the Frug, 9, and I trying to speak to one another and avoid 12’s replacement’s evilness)…

Sarcasmo: “Well, that’s unfortunate”

Sarcasmo: “That’s just great. Great job. Really” *rolls eyes*

Sarcasmo: “WHAT?? WHAT?? OMG, what is your problem, MOM?”

Sarcasmo: “Can we just go now?”

The Frug and I kept looking at each other like, “Who the F*CK is this kid and can we just leave him here?” Well, that’s what I was thinking anyway 😉

So, parents of teens, how many years of this bullshit can we expect? It’s already getting very old.

This entry was posted on April 30, 2011, in Uncategorized. 4 Comments

Quickie Hair Update

Well, they didn’t chop it off…YET.  They said that another client had a similar result (hello, tell a girl that upfront next time!)…so, they re-did the frizzed out pieces…just painted on the keratin, blew those pieces out and flatironed them. I couldn’t watch. Nervous wreck! lol So, it seems “fine” right now…we shall see what happens when I wash it and dry it myself. *fingers crossed*

Little shoutout to my friend Jen…who freely admitted that she had a little frisson of joy seeing the pix of my fried coif. Bitch!  Lol. But, believe me, of all people, I totally get that!  Like the feeling of smug joy I got when she would come back from getting a BANG up hair cut — you know, when they massacre your bangs, leaving you with the shortest fringe that takes months to grow out — BANG!

Good to know, that even in our mid-40s (*gasps*), we can still be bitchy teenagers. *giggles*

This entry was posted on April 29, 2011, in Uncategorized. 1 Comment

William and Kate leave Buckingham Palace in an Aston Martin convertible

So, Lainey titled her post “Badass Departure”…and part of me gets that. The Astin Martin is H-O-T!!! However comma WTHell kind of reception was it that the bride and groom were able to drive themselves outta there?  Say it with me: BOOORRRRRRIIIIINNNNGGGG!!  lol Seriously tho, did they have a cash bar? 2 drink tickets each?? Beer/wine only? What gives??  I have heard QE2 is a cheap beyotch. Lmao.

William and Kate leave Buckingham Palace in an Aston Martin convertible.

This entry was posted on April 29, 2011, in Uncategorized. Leave a comment

Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge leaves Clarence House to travel to Buckingham Palace for the evening

First of all, how tiny is this girl’s waist??? She’s not a petite thing, she’s like 5’9″ or something, right? I’m betting her waist is under 24 inches. BITCH!

Secondly, WTF is Camilla wearing? My mother seriously had a robe that looked like that. Someone on Twitter said something about “Camilla in a Caftan” — I joked that that could be a new expletive like “Christ on a Cracker”, kwim?! Camilla in a Caftan! *snorts*

Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge leaves Clarence House to travel to Buckingham Palace for the evening.

This entry was posted on April 29, 2011, in Uncategorized. Leave a comment

Was Pippa Middleton’s Wedding Look Inspired by Cameron Diaz? – Style & Beauty – UsMagazine.com

Pippa Middleton, first of all, what the hell kind of name is PIPPA?! Silly Brits. Anyway, I LOVED LOVED her dress. Think she has a bit too much of an orange glow working but that’s okay. She lucked out with that maid-of-honor dress, doncha think?!

Her duties SUCKED tho. In England, they have a bunch of tiny young attendants and poor Pippa had to wrangle them. *giggles*  Maybe she’ll get to hook up with Hot Harry tonight to make up for it?

Was Pippa Middleton’s Wedding Look Inspired by Cameron Diaz? – Style & Beauty – UsMagazine.com.

This entry was posted on April 29, 2011, in Uncategorized. Leave a comment